Genealogy Humor

"I'm My Own Grandpa"


Many many years ago, When I was twenty-three,
I got married to a widow, Who was pretty as could be.

This widow had a grown-up daughter, Who had hair of red.
My father fell in love with her, And soon the two were wed.

This made my dad my son-in-law, And changed my very life.
My daughter was my mother, For she was my father's wife.

To complicate the matters worse, Although it brought me joy,
I soon became the father; Of a bouncing baby boy.

My little baby then became, A brother-in-law to dad.

And so became my uncle, Though it made me very sad.

For if he was my uncle, Then that also made him brother
To the widow's grown-up daughter, Who, of course, was my step-mother.

Father's wife then had a son, Who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandson, For he was my daughter's son.

My wife is now my mother's mother, And it makes me blue.
Because, although she is my wife, She's my grandmother too.

If my wife is my grandmother, Then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it, It simply drives me wild.

For now I have become, The strangest case you ever saw.
As the husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa!

I'm my own grandpa.
I'm my own grandpa.
It sounds funny, I know,
But it really is so,
Oh, I'm my own grandpa.

Genealogists say the funniest things!

These quotes are from copies of actual correspondence received by the

Family History Department of the LDS Church:

We are sending you 5 children in a separate envelope.

My Grandfather died at the age of 3.

Will you please send me the name of my first wife? I have forgotten her name.

We lost our Grandmother, will you please send us a copy?

The wife of #22 could not be found. Somebody suggested that she might have been stillborn - what do you think?

Will you send me a list of all the Dripps in your library?

Further research will be necessary to eliminate one of the parents.

He and his daughter are listed as not being born.

I would like to find out if I have any living relatives or dead relatives or ancestors in my family.

A 14-year-old boy wrote: "I do not want you to do my research for me. Will you please send me all of the material on the Welch line, in the US, England and Scotland countries? I will do the research.